SUCKABCRAZEE

SUCKA B.
It had been one of those long days where it felt like the forces of nature were working against me. I had finally made it home and suddenly realized, I had spent the whole day sucking cock. The proof was that my knees were on fire and my mouth felt like it was lined in beaver fur. Unlike some of my friends who do this for a living, I didn't come home with a wad of cash for all of my hard work. Instead all I had to show for it was 35 cents and half of a Reese's' peanut butter cup. I tried to make myself feel better by thinking of all of my efforts as missionary work or physical therapy.
First there was an ex boyfriend who stopped by in the morning. He's an ex but he still likes to come by and try to get off before he goes to his landscaping gig. I was showing him my new bar stools, when he jumped up on one of them and with a huge smile, says to me "Hey this is the perfect height."
I played along, " For what, a blow job.?"
He's like " Okay."
The mere momentary mention of fellatio, is enough to get him all worked up. He pulls his dick out and starts pushing my head down to his crotch. Subtle. So I did it because , well , I like sucking his cock , and it sure beats what he used to make me do. A hundred years ago all he wanted to do was eat out my ass, and it drove me crazy. He would come over and say hello and before I could finish saying hello back he had disappeared like an ostrich into my ass and wouldn't come back for the longest time. I would forget he was down there sometimes, and I would make important phone calls and clip coupons.
It took a little while but I finally trained him to do what I wanted him to do, which is come over sit back and let me blow him so that we can both be done and get back to living our lives. I just had to convince him it was better and less time consuming this way.
After a few minutes , he blows his load. Smiling like he just made off with the big prize, we walk out together and I say goodbye to him and his dog waiting for him in his truck. The only thing is , when it comes to my ex, blow jobs are a lot like Chinese food . In an hour he 'll just want another one.
Hey , that's not my problem. I make my way to Allen's house because I try to stop by at least once a week to make sure he hasn't overdosed on GHB and fallen into a pile of glass or something. Oh yeah and sometimes I might suck his cock, just to stay sharp, you know keep my skill set on point. I walk into his studio and find him in his usual spot, sitting in front of his computer monitor like Captain Kirk at the helm, only Captain Kirk never wore boxer shorts and house slippers.
We start chatting when I notice Allen begins to nod out, and then coming back and then nodding out, and then back . and then out until, finally , I realize, it's entirely up to me to save his life. I would need to administer CPR, to his dick. If I didn't he could fall over and drown in a cup of water or be buried under an avalanche of lava lamps , Tupperware and assorted 70"s memorabilia. Without thinking twice I dropped to my knees and blew him like I wanted him to live.
After some time the drugs began to wear off. Allen begins to talk uncontrollably about the craziest shit, mostly about celebrities he has never met but can't help but make references to as if they had stopped by earlier that week to fill him in on what's new. He's like " Did you see Mariah Carey on Saturday Night Live, she just got married you know."
I ignore him, maybe he will shut up.
he's like " Drew Barrymore is doing make up ads on TV now. She must need to pay the mortgage."
That's it, he will be fine, my work was done and so before he returned to the here and now , I made my exit.
The great thing about Allen is he is so completely self absorbed he doesn't really give a shit if you say goodbye or even hello. He only wants to know what you brought him or, what you are going to do for him. When he wakes up with his dick out and nobody there, it will take him a full day before he realizes I came by at all.
And you know what, that is fine with me.
As I am walking out of Allen's building I get this text message from Brian. He's a guy I have been blowing for years and it's because he always manages to stay looking great. It's like he never ages. While the world around him and the people in it grow older he stays in shape and smiling. And wouldn't you if you never got older. His message is an invitation to come by his house and visit. Translation, come over and suck my dick. I decide to head over because I have never flaked on an invitation from Brian and I feel it's so important to be consistent , just to maintain a friendly relationship. So in other words I am doing it just to be polite.
Brian answers the door with a huge smile and shirtless. It is so nice to have someone make you feel welcome. I hate when I arrive at someones house and they hand me a mop or point me in the direction of the laundry room , I think it is so rude. Brian never does that. He always has a root beer waiting for me with a fat bowl of weed and a funny story.
This visit would be different, however. As I am choking on a huge hit off the pipe, he let's me know he has a limited amount of time and was hoping we can skip the formalities and get right into the fellatio. I admit I was a little disappointed but I figure, what the hell. I don't have anything new to talk about and I think there has been a lull in current events so fuck it. Who needs to talk.
And we're off. I'm blowing Brian like his dick is the last spigot for dear life, and it's very apparent he appreciates it. But something starts to feel not quite right. Its as if the whole thing begins to derail, and even though neither one of us has said anything, we can both feel it creeping up over us. I pop his dick out of my mouth and take the initiative, I'm like " Is there something wrong?"
I can see he wants to say no , but he finally gives in to the truth. He's like, "It's my stomach, suddenly I feel like I may need to run to the bathroom."
I slide over and motion for him to pass, because when it comes to bodily functions, please don't let me stand in your way. He gives me a nervous little smile and then bolts for the bathroom, but not before he expels a few notes of butt music before slamming the door closed and swinging the toilet seat up. It happens.
After a few tense moments of running water coming form the bathroom I start putting my clothes back on and as I prepare to get going, I stop by the bathroom door to ask if everything is OK.
This is always an awkward moment because you don't want to let the other person know that you know that he knows that you know what is going down in there. There is a certain amount of fantasy that you want to try to maintain, and anything going on in that room will destroy any fantasy or possibility for any in the future.
He's like " I' m fine. be right out."
But his sheepish tone tells me It's time to split. So I'm like " I gotta go but call me later."
He says he will and I am out of there so the man can feel comfortable exercising his demons. And that brings me to the end of my day as a cock sucking whore with a heart of gold. And as exhausting as it was I walked home feeling good about the work I had done. I saved careers, I saved lives and I saved face. Nobody was arrested and there were no injuries, and even if I didn't make a cent , I felt rich in positivity. My karma bank runneth over, I just wish I had worn knee pads. Maybe next time.
If you would like to schedule an appointment for my own brand of physical therapy....just wait until Christmas or your birthday and if you have been good , some how I will know and I will find you.